wuylfan:

I’m not over anywhere except trying to figure out where I stand now with you because this part is always the hardest. We’re always going back and forth, wanting each other to be happy but wanting nobody but each other and it doesn’t work because yes we got bored of each other but we don’t want to admit it but we did. It’s— like you said, reliability. We’re too used to each other to move on but that’s what we need to do I think. Because we don’t get anywhere. 

We don’t get anywhere? You’re kidding me, right? I’ve tried for a considerable amount of time to try and bring it all back, but I always get your yawn or grunt in response and it’s really not that hard to see why things get downhill. You’re tired, I know. You won fifty more awards than I ever did - our groups, anyways - and you have to work hard for them, but if this is how it has to be to balance success and a love life, it’s better than we move on. Keep in mind though, just because something is good for us, doesn’t mean that we can do it. Getting rid of cars will fix the ozone layer and possibly cure global warming, but every manufacturer keeps releasing new models each year. It's good for us to move on and see other people, but can you throw away two years that quick? It’s already been 23 months and it’s as far as we can get, I guess. Even if we make up, I can’t be here for you like I’ve always been. I know how you feel for real now and it’s not just your voice I hear in your head when we kiss and I see your blank stare, rather than the smiles and gazes of pure satisfaction. You used to think you held the world’s rarest diamond, but as time passes, I’ve deteriorated into a lump of coal - a resource that was once important, but now no longer needed. I get it. I understand. It happens, but that doesn’t mean it doesn’t break my heart.